Does it seem like your teenager would sleep all day if you let them? You’re definitely not the only parent wondering what’s going on. Research has found that over 40% of U.S. teens experience excessive daytime sleepiness. Some of this sleepiness is a normal part of puberty and adolescence. Your teen’s body and brain are going through enormous changes, which affect their sleep rhythms. At the same time, feeling tired all the time can sometimes be a sign that something else is going on. So, how do you know when your sleepy teenager is just being a teenager, and when it might be time to get them some extra support? Here’s what parents need to know.
Why is my teen always so tired?
There are actually biological reasons why your teen might be sleeping all the time. They’re going through puberty, which comes with intense hormonal changes that absolutely can affect their energy levels.
Hormonal changes to mood and alertness
Hormonal changes that happen during puberty can have a direct effect on your teen’s brain chemicals. This includes chemicals that are responsible for their mood and alertness. You might notice that your teen is not only sleepier, but also more irritable or moody.
Changes in sleep stages
Your teen’s actual sleep architecture, or the way their brain moves through different stages of sleep, changes during puberty.
One of the biggest changes is a decrease in delta sleep, which is the deep, slow-wave stage of sleep. Research has found that slow-wave sleep and delta activity decline significantly through adolescence as the brain matures. So your teen could be tired because the quality of their sleep is changing.
Circadian rhythm shifts that don’t align with school schedules
Teens aren’t adults. They still need over 9 hours of sleep every night, just like children do. But puberty can shift their circadian rhythm — their “biological clock” — and make them naturally feel sleepier later at night. Melatonin, the sleep hormone, gets released up to 2 hours later in teens.
That might explain why your teen is such a night owl and wants to stay up late, even on weeknights. They’re not just being rebellious.
Unfortunately, school schedules don’t usually account for these circadian rhythm shifts. They still need to wake up early to go to school, which means that the vast majority of teens aren’t getting enough sleep.
Growth spurts
Growing is also understandably exhausting! Most kids go through growth spurts during their teenage years. Their muscles and bones are growing, and this takes a lot of physical energy. This can understandably lead to fatigue.
Other mental health or medical causes
Even though normal hormonal changes can make many teens feel tired all the time, there are other causes that can play a role, too.
Some other issues that can cause your teen to be excessively tired include:
- Mental health conditions like depression or anxiety
- Thyroid conditions
- Sleep disorders like sleep apnea
- Chronic pain
- Using drugs or alcohol
- Certain medications
- Stress
- Nutritional deficiencies
Mental health and sleep issues
Sleep and mental health have a complicated, two-way relationship. Poor sleep and excessive tiredness can sometimes be caused by an underlying mental health condition. But poor sleep can also make it harder for them to cope with their mental health.
For example, anxiety might keep your teen awake because their mind won’t stop racing at night. Depression can sometimes cause insomnia, but it can also cause hypersomnia, which means sleeping excessively. Some teens with depression might sleep for long periods and still wake up feeling exhausted.
On the other hand, repeatedly not getting enough sleep can make it harder for your teen’s brain to regulate emotions. They may feel more irritable, anxious, overwhelmed, or emotionally reactive when they’re sleep-deprived. Getting consistently poor sleep over time can also make your teen more susceptible to developing mental health conditions.
Is it normal for my teen to sleep so much? Or is it a red flag?
It can absolutely be normal for your teen to need more sleep because of the reasons we talked about. Especially if they’re staying up late on school nights, they might sleep all day on the weekend because they’re so sleep-deprived.
But sometimes, sleeping a lot can be a sign of an underlying physical or mental health issue. And being tired all the time can also be a sign that your teen isn’t getting enough sleep, which can lead to more health complications down the line.
If you’re concerned about your teen, it’s important not to brush your worries under the rug. Bring them to their pediatrician or a mental health provider for an evaluation.
It’s especially important to take action if:
- Your teen’s excessive sleep is getting in the way of their functioning, like their grades or their social life
- They tell you they aren’t able to fall asleep at night because of racing thoughts or worries
- The excessive sleepiness came on after they started a new medication
- They spend excessive amounts of time in bed, but not sleeping (“bed-rotting”)
- They regularly get 8 to 10 hours of sleep but are still struggling to stay awake during the day
- They snore very loudly, gasp or choke in their sleep, or seem to stop breathing temporarily
- Their sleep habits or energy levels have changed suddenly without an obvious explanation
- They’ve become more and more withdrawn, hopeless, irritable, or uninterested in things they used to enjoy
- They’re experiencing other unexplained physical symptoms along with the fatigue
Bed-rotting vs. sleeping
It’s also important to distinguish actually sleeping from simply spending a lot of time in bed. “Bed-rotting” has become a popular term for spending hours or even entire days lying in bed, often scrolling or watching TV. Your teen might call it rest, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re tired or sleeping.
Sometimes, staying in bed can be a way of shutting down when everything feels overwhelming. For teens dealing with chronic stress or trauma, it can look a lot like a “freeze” response: withdrawing from the world and staying somewhere that feels safe.
Bed-rotting isn’t a clinical diagnosis or automatically a sign of trauma, but if your teen is spending more and more time in bed without actually sleeping, it’s worth taking notice and getting them support.
How to help, and what not to do
On top of getting them a medical evaluation, there are other things you can do as a parent to help your teen get better sleep at night.
What to do:
- Help them build a realistic sleep routine. The goal is having relatively consistent bedtimes and wake-up times, but remember that your teen may naturally not feel sleepy as early as they did when they were younger. Try to focus on consistency rather than a certain time you think they should be in bed by.
- Work with them on screen habits before bed. Instead of immediately taking away their phone, talk together about what feels realistic and research how late-night scrolling might be affecting their sleep.
- Build trust with your child, and have open conversations about mental health and substance use. Sleeping all the time may be a sign that your teen is struggling with something they haven’t told you about and needs your support.
- Help them eat regularly and get enough nutrients. Nutritional deficiencies and skipping meals can contribute to fatigue. A bloodwork panel can help identify deficiencies that might be contributing.
- Encourage movement and time outside. Even if they’re not into sports, they can do things like walking the dog, spending time with you or their friends outside, or playing at a trampoline park.
- Advocate for later school start times when possible. Teen circadian rhythms don’t line up particularly well with very early school mornings, and later start times can help teens get more sleep. There may already be a parent group at your school advocating for this.
What not to do:
- Don’t criticize or punish your teen for sleeping. Remember that there are biological reasons why your teen might be so tired all the time. Calling your teen lazy won’t address the underlying reason they’re tired and may make them less likely to talk to you about what’s going on.
- Let them sleep more than usual, but don’t let them sleep all day every weekend. Catching up on some lost sleep is understandable, but sleeping until late afternoon can push their body clock even later and make the next school week harder.
- Don’t force an extremely early bedtime if they aren’t sleepy. Sending your teen to bed at 8 or 9 p.m. doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll get more sleep; they may just spend hours lying awake, which can make insomnia even worse.
- Don’t assume excessive sleep is “just hormones.” If your teen is consistently exhausted or struggling to function, get them evaluated.
Looking for teen therapy in Houston, TX? Looking for teen therapy in Houston, TX?
It’s normal for teens to be tired and need more sleep. But sometimes, this sleepiness can be a sign of a bigger mental health struggle.
If your teen is withdrawing from you and other loved ones, missing school, seeming sadder or more irritable than usual, or having a hard time getting through their daily life, weekly therapy may not feel like enough.
Jones Wellness Center offers a mental health intensive outpatient program (IOP) for teens in Houston, TX. IOP gives teens more support than traditional weekly therapy while allowing them to continue living at home and staying connected to their everyday lives.
If you’re worried about your teenager’s mental health, you don’t need to wait until things get worse before asking for help. Reach out to Jones Wellness Center to learn more about our teen IOP in Houston and whether it could be the right level of support for your family. We’d love to hear from you.